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Today started off like any other school day. My son got ready for school and brushed his teeth and washed his face (which is an event because if he had his way, he never would) and then got his supplies ready and put on his shoes. As he was tying his basic Converse Chuck Taylors (the black shoes in the center of the photo), I asked him why he was wearing those again and not the high top red or green ones. My son Alaka'i really wanted the high tops initially which is why I purchased them for him along with a new pair of Chuck Taylors. He told me that some boy at school, let's just call the boy Kasey, told him that the green camo pattern (Alaka'is favorite) were "retarded and ugly". Alaka'i and I sat and had a long talk about how he should wear something because he likes it and not to let what other people, especially bullies think or say influence him otherwise. We talked about how sometimes people say mean things because they are jealous and wish they had something that you own or because they're simply mean. What really impacted Alaka'i was when I told him that if I went to school and offered "Kasey" a pair of the green camo shoes, I guarantee he'd want them. Needless to say that after our conversation, he laced up his green camo Converse high top sneakers and walked to the car with a smile on his face.
My son Alaka'i is no stranger to bullying either. This is not his first time at the rodeo but my sweet boy knows that even if someone hits him or says something mean to him, it's not an excuse for him to hit back or say something equally mean or lame back to them. I told him to either let the teacher know or let me know and we'd handle it. The bullies are lucky he's so passive and nice because my boy is tall for his age and towers over most of his classmates. If he were to let his rage take over, he would knock that brat out. Luckily he listens to my instructions and doesn't do anything because fighting solves nothing. I told him that he should stand up for himself and tell the bully to cut it out and that if it persists, let me know.
I'd be lying if I said that I didn't have some choice words for that little putz "Kasey". I'd love to sling some expletives and cut downs his way. It's hard to not revert to my old habits and my sharp tongue because it had gotten me through being bullied in high school but it also backfired and I got a reputation in school for being mean because of it. I wasn't a Christian then either so now I really have to watch my words and my actions and do what is right. I don't want to teach my son the wrong way, I want him to know how to act and how to do the right thing from the start so he doesn't have to correct any bad habits when he gets older like I do.
Bullies have always been around. I myself have been a victim of bullying in elementary school, so bad at one point that I got beat up and became a loner because of it. In high school there were cliques and some bullying but by then I had toughened up so I would shoot the cut downs right back at them. Did it solve anything? No. I just for the life of me can't understand why some kids feel the need to cut others down to feel more important. Then again, bullying isn't exclusive only to children. In fact, adults bully each other just as much if not more than children. I think that it hurts more when you're a child because you're not jaded and haven't had the chance to develop thick skin. When you're a child you just want to fit in and be liked and accepted. You don't want to be made to feel bad or left out. That's why I believe it's important to give my son a strong sense of self so he doesn't bend his ways and shift his morals to fit in with the crowd. Even with that strong sense of self and a positive self-image, it still stings to get cut down.
Bullies are cowards and morons. If they had brains or real guts, they'd find a better way to get attention than to cut someone else down. Then again, you have to wonder what they have or are enduring at home to bring out this angry and bullying nature. I know my bullies were cut down regularly by their parents and I know others who lived in homes with a lot of fighting and violence and bullying between parents that they witnessed. I feel bad for bullies because they act that way either due to a bad home life or due to a lack of intelligence. Either way it's a losing situation. Having a bad home life is no excuse to be mean, rude or violent towards anyone. If they can't find constructive ways to channel that anger, it will just lead to their demise. A bully's worst enemy is the person they look at when they glance in the mirror.
It's so hard as a parent seeing your child bullied or cut down. I want so badly to protect him and shield him but I can't do that 24/7. I never truly grasped how hard being a parent is. You think when you're pregnant that it will be this adorable dream and it gets progressively harder as they age. I used to think that the hardest part would be all the work taking care of a newborn but it's not. That was fun. The hardest part is watching your child go out into the world and knowing they will be exposed to things and people you would not allow them to see or be associated with if they were with you. That's why it's so important to talk with your children and have that open line of communication with them so that they're not afraid to come to you with anything.
Just looking at old pictures of me and my son Alaka'i when he was a baby. I can't believe he's 10 and about to end 4th grade already!!! Time flies. The photo above was from his first visit to the zoo when he was about 9 months old and I had just chopped off all my hair. Wow, I do not look good in short hair!! haha
I hope my son grows to be a Godly, good man. Lord knows that I have my flaws but I try so hard to teach him to be honest and to always do what is right, no matter how hard it is. God protect him and keep him close to you!!! I am so thankful that I am blessed with such an amazing son. I just pray that he stays strong in his faith and allows Jesus to lead him in his life.
Even on my worst day, even when he's grumpy or bratty, he lights my life up with pure joy. This picture is of my boy just a week ago. Love my son!!
He looks so much like my little brother Peter and my dad. He even acts like them. It's so cute to watch them all interact. My brother and I had a blast growing up. Love this picture with him and my mama!!!
Be good to your mamas everyone!! I am so thankful to have mine still alive and in my life. She almost died of lung cancer 3 years ago and she's fully healed now, Praise Jesus!!
I hope you all have a wonderful week with those you love. Tell them you love them, even if they already know. If you have loved ones that you aren't on good terms with, write them a note or call them and mend that bridge!! You don't want to wait until it's too late and wish you always had made up with them.
xoxo,
Jean
This week flew by for me...well parts of it anyway. Between my work and being a mom and aunt, my week was packed!! I feel so blessed and thankful to God for every gift He's given me, especially my son whom I love so much and my adorable nieces.
I hope you all had a wonderful and blessed week and that your weekend is going well!! Is it just me or does the weekend seem to fly by in a blink? Sigh.
Xoxo,
Jean
Welcome to the "Aloha Friday Hop", hosted by What Jean Likes and Local Sugar Hawaii! Aloha Friday Blog Hop is a brand new weekly feature that will run for 6 days and occur every Friday at 12 midnight Hawaii Standard Time. Aloha Friday Blog Hop is a great way to meet new people and learn new things as well as increase your blog followers! So let's have some fun!!
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This is all about sharing the Aloha spirit with other bloggers out there and helping each other to gain some exposure and find some awesome blogs to read!!! You don't have to be from Hawai'i to participate! In fact, we encourage and welcome people from all over the world to join us on this Aloha Friday Blog hop!
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LIST IS NOW CLOSED. VISIT OUR ALOHA FRIDAY BLOG HOP LINK ON THE TOP OF OUR PAGE FOR THE NEWEST ALOHA FRIDAY BLOG HOP!
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| Photo taken PRE Grand Opening courtesy of PBN |
Until recently, TJ Maxx was on that wishlist of stores that I wanted to come here. On Thursday May 3, 2012 the first of 3 TJ Maxx locations opened here and I was so excited to go visit the store because it took a rather large space and I wanted to see if it was as amazing as other TJ Maxx locations I visited in Washington and California when I was on vacation. I didn't get to go until a week later which was fine with me because the crowds of curious shoppers had slowed down.
Here are the specs of the Honolulu TJ Maxx location:
TJ Maxx opened its first Hawaii store in 16 years at the Ward Village Shops on Thursday.The 35,000 square-foot store is the first of three new TJ Maxx stores that the Massachusetts-based TJX Cos. (TJX) plan to open in Hawaii this month.TJ Maxx will open a 25,000 square-foot store at Pearl City Gateway on May 10, and a 24,850 square-foot stare at Pearlridge Center in Aiea on May 17.“We are pleased to expand our store base to Hawaii, delivering value and an exciting selection of fashion to serve the needs of Hawaii customers,” TJX President Richard Sherr said in a statement.
I walked in the brightly lit store to see a huge space filled with colorful clothes and I have to admit, I wanted to jump with excitement. As I browsed, I saw some great brands and some good deals but was somewhat disappointed at the selection. There were a few key brands there like Calvin Klein, and Joie (both of which I love) but for the most part, it was a mess of different brands sloppily thrown together on racks. For those of you who don't know me, I'm not a skinny chick. I wish I was thinner but I'm considered "plus sized". I browsed and found a few lovely dresses and shirts that I liked...in a size small or medium. Yeah. Whomp whomp whomp!!
I inquired with an employee who told me that they don't have some sizes in a lot of clothes for some reason (she didn't know) and that they did have a "plus sized section" and she seemed proud of it and took me there. Now to be clear, "plus sized" to TJ Maxx is XL-XXL and I think the pant size goes up to 22. Calling this rack of clothes a "section" was a joke. It was literally 1 rack with 2 sides about the length of a Schwinn bicycle and that's it. The clothes on that rack were not designer and not cute (which doesn't surprise me as there aren't many plus sized outfits I'd consider cute). Oh well, so I moved on and searched for my mom (whom isn't plus sized) and she was browsing the racks. If you're a size XS-M you are going to LOVE this store. If you're a large, you might find some cute stuff but if you're XL or bigger, skip it.
There was a men's section which was ok I guess. Nothing special. There was a kids clothing section which was small and limited but had a few cute things but nothing special. I know this is Hawai'i but there was a swimwear section that was much larger than it needed to be and the suits weren't worth the price. The "toys" section was small, limited and sad. On a positive note, they had some good deals on a limited amount of hair products and perfume.
I don't know, I just didn't like this store. We have a lot of Ross' stores here and they're dusty and disorganized too but they have a lot more for people of varying sizes. TJ Maxx had a few more brand name designers but Nordstrom Rack offers similar pricing and better designers. I just think that this specific TJ Maxx was a fail. Nothing special whatsover and the "deals" were not very impressive.
Honestly, I really wanted to like this store. I really did. The buyers of this store need to get a clue. They think they have a handle on "Hawai'i customers" but they don't. Not everyone in Hawai'i is a size 8 and below. For some reason they seem to be under the impression that the tourists that come here are all waifs which is very far from the truth. I've seen quite a few big girls cruising down Waikiki.
Bottom line, if TJ Maxx Honolulu wants to stay in business, they're going to need to regroup and really think about the main demographic that shops there. The majority of locals here are between a size 6 and a size 20. There are some very skinny girls here as well but buying for primarily size 0 isn't going to impress the "average" sized girl or the "plus sized girl". I also think that they have a lot of random stuff there that doesn't need to be. They have one small lane of "housewares" that they could easily lose and fill with more clothes and as a result, gain more customers.
I know some of you are going to read this and disagree and yes, I know they're brand new and have to get their groove on and figure out what sells and all of that but as of right now, they need to readjust their target audience and the buyers need to really think about what REAL women want. They should consult the TJ Maxx near South Center in Washington State. That store was amazing.
As of right now, the Honolulu TJ Maxx is like a wannabe Ross with less selection and less dust on their fixtures. They're going to have some steep competition with Nordstrom Rack right across the street. I wish them luck. Oh, and I almost forgot to mention that there is no real signage or directions to the store from the street or within the parking structure. The parking area could use a few large arrows with a sign that says "TJ Maxx this way" because I counted 10 people lost as I walked back to the car.
Just my humble opinion. I hope they get some buyers who know what they're doing and fix what's wrong because I'd really love to like shopping at TJ Maxx Honolulu. Maybe their store in Pearl City will be better. Here's hoping!
He was really excited about getting these shoes. Ever since he watched The Sandlot with me, he's wanted the "PF Flyers" aka Converse All Star shoes. I ordered a few pairs when they had an awesome sale on their website and surprised him after school. Needless to say, he was really happy.
Oh and these are his shoes. He wanted me to specifically put a picture of the shoes alone so "everyone could see how awesome they are".
Gotta love my silly guy. He's the light of my life. After we did our little shufflin' photo sesh, he was asking me about why I have told him since he was a baby that he had chocolate brown eyes. Naturally, I took a photo to show him. This specific photo was his favorite because I enhanced the shadows and made the light harsh. I like that he has layers of brown in his eyes. It's something I never noticed before but a great camera and a bright flash shows everything!!
Can you believe it's Thursday already?! Not complaining but the week just flew by for me. Working a lot tends to do that though!! I hope you all are having a wonderful week.
