I know, I know only a few days ago I wrote about not letting the small stuff get you down and that disputing over small matters is a waste of time but I need to get a few things off my chest. Regardless of where you live, what you do, what you believe or what kind of person you are, I'm sure that you can all agree that there are situations and people in your life that frustrate you beyond measure. Lately I've been encountered with quite a few people and situations that have pushed me right up to my limit where the nice Jean who reserves her words wants to go on vacation and the "mean Jean" that I've put far away in the back of my mind since becoming a Christian, wants to come out. Oh, it's tempting let me tell you... the very thought of allowing my mean side to come out and give these people a tongue lashing and put them in their place is very tempting. However, it's not the Christian thing to do... Why cause unnecessary strife over the small things, right? I opt for the classy response of just brushing it off and moving along but lately it's been building up to the point that I am about to take certain people aside and call them on their stuff. If I were to do that, however, I would be no better than the people who are being nice (yet condescending) to my face and judgmental behind my back. It's like I'm in a "Hey Taylor Imma let you finish but...." Kanye West-ish moment where I can stand up for myself and make a scene or politely stand by and do the right thing. In this situation, taking the "Taylor" approach is the way to go. Anything I'd try to say to defend myself or to call these people out on their judgmental, condescending and prideful attitudes would be twisted by them to make me look bad.
I don't know what frustrates me more, the fact that these people are condescending and cliquish or the fact that they put on an "oh-so-nice I'm a good Christian didn't you know" kind of face while doing it. It's people who gossip, condescend, leave people out and look down upon others that make God look bad. They misrepresent Jesus Christ and that drives me crazy. I'm not going to go into a biblical rant right now but I'm just hurt and very disappointed at the actions and attitudes of a few people and then the laziness of another. It's just baffling to me. I know the people of whom I'm vaguely describing don't read my blog and I won't defame them by putting their names or going into too much detail but at the same time, I need a forum to vent my frustrations so I'm going to do so in the most generalized way I possibly can. It's real time....
Tell me if you know anyone like these people... and share with me how you got beyond your frustration. This is not limited to the quasi-Christian group either because all people are prone to hypocritical douchebaggary.
- The condescending poser. (This personality trait actually applies to all of the individuals that I'm going to vent about). This is the kind of person who when you first meet them, is very nice and welcoming and tries to pry into your life acting like they care all the while making their own assumptions about who you are as a person without ever truly trying to get to know you as a person (because they don't actually care, duh). I'm somewhat of an introvert by nature but once I am around people I'm comfortable with, I open up (unless I get the feeling I can't trust them). This is how my fiancé and I became friends, because he took the time to get to know me and we talked all the time. Truth be told, I don't open up to many people because in general, very few people give a rip about you and what you're going through. Anyways... this person, the condescending poser, they act like they care and the moment you open up, they tell other people your personal business and/or use it against you to either ice you out or call you prideful for actually having a bad day or an opinion. I have a chick right now who wants to hang out with me to "get to know me" and I know her game, I'm not stupid. She's prying because I haven't opened up to many of the people in the semi-cliquish group to which we both socialize with. The reason I don't open up is because I was a bad girl when I was younger, I partied, I did dumb things and I made big mistakes. They already judge me for being 31 (almost 32) and having a kid, the look of utter shock and dismay when I mentioned my son when I first started to get to know them said it all. Yeah, I look younger than I am, thank you Jesus, but how dare you judge me. God forgave me the minute I asked Him to forgive me for all of my sins and my son is the biggest blessing God gave me till now and I love him with all of my heart. So yeah, there's that judgment and whatever, I could care less. But... when someone who is younger than me tries to sit there and pull apart my life and condescend to me like he/she is my elder? THAT is something that frustrates me to no end. Respect your elders! LOL. Seriously though, condescending to anyone is never good regardless of your faith or background. Be respectful and courteous, even if someone doesn't quite fit in with your group.
- The "People kiss up to me because they think I'm a star and I agree so I'm going to act like I'm doing my job but not actually do it" person. This person also has the same personality trait as #1 but wait, there's more! This person is exactly what they sound like in the description. In a point of power and respect so people automatically assume this person is wonderful and boy-oh-boy does he play the part and put on a show! Yes, this person (and there are a couple of them in the same group), they like to put on the show and they are the stars!! Join their group or volunteer to help them and you get to watch them not allow anyone else to contribute or help because it might take time away from them in the spotlight. Oh no, we can't have that! After all, they're the stars!! Yeah, and they act so humble in front of the older people and the leaders... They don't want them to see through the act. Anyone with a brain and 15 or more minutes to hang out with them will get to see through the foggy mirror that they put up and see the truth. It's sad, so sad when someone gets paid to do a job they don't do. It's oh so sad when someone is so threatened by what another person could contribute because they're afraid that they might lose some of the spotlight that they don't let anyone help. If you're going to do a job and get paid, do it right. And although this situation can apply to the workplace, I'm not talking about anyone I work with for my job. Colossians 3:23 says "Whatever you do, work heartily, as for the Lord and not for men". God is watching you all the time, even when people aren't around. You should at least try to do the job you are getting paid for or getting called to do. Just sayin'
Basically, I'm just sick of fake people walking around with a smile on their face and judgment in their heart. I haven't necessarily been the object of judgement either... I've just had the distinct displeasure to have witnessed these people treat others poorly and exclude those that don't fit neatly with their perfect little clique. Sad but true.
It's true, we are all sinners, we all make mistakes, we are all humans. Yes... I forgive them... I don't even bring my issues up to them because they'd twist it to somehow justify their actions, I watched them do it to other people. It's just frustrating to me to see people sit in judgment of others and condescend to people, especially when they claim to be men/women of God and they also are put in positions of power (so to speak) by the leaders of the church who are blissfully unaware of the wolves in sheep's clothing they have within their church. Hey, no one is perfect, no church is perfect, but don't pretend to be a good person when you're not and don't think that you can pull the wool over my eyes and try to judge me and my life without me noticing. Unlike some of the "bubble" babies who never went through hell in their lives, I've seen pretty much all of the evil and awful in the world. It makes seeing through the fake facade they put forth even easier.
Thanks for letting me rant guys, I needed to get this out of me. I feel better. Just praying for them that God helps them to realize their wrong actions because I am a sinner as well and am in no place to condemn them but seriously, treat others as you would like to be treated. Sure, it's overused and some people consider it trite, but it's valid and true and there's a reason it's called The Golden Rule.
Love you all, I hope you all are having a wonderful start to your weekend!! Some fun and not-so-dramatic posts coming this weekend!
Xo,
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