Letting the Past Wash Away...

12:15 PM

So it's 2013 now... Can you believe it?  I seriously am having a hard time really grasping the fact that it's 2013.  To me it feels like I just graduated high school not long ago but turns out, that was thirteen years ago!!  I swear just a minute ago my son was a chubby baby in diapers and now he's eleven.  Where did the time go?

I don't know if it's just me, but it feels like as the years progress, time just flies by faster and faster. I remember my mother and even my grandma saying something similar when I was a kid.  Geesh, am I getting that old?  Growing up, time seemed to drag on and the school day took forever but now I barely get my work done and it's time to get about the rest of my day and prepare for picking up my son and cooking dinner.  Is time relative or is it really going by faster?  I read somewhere that the recent huge earthquakes like the one in Japan a couple years ago, caused the earth to slightly tilt on it's axis, shortening the day by milliseconds [interesting article about that here].  Is that why the days seem to fly by or is time just relative like everything else in life.

I could get all scientific and mention Einstein's theory of relativity but nah.... I'll skip that stuff, we all got enough of it in school.   I think all experiences in life are relative.  I laugh as I type this but I remember a funny quote from a rather cheesy movie called Deep Blue Sea where LL Cool J's character Preacher is talking to another character (Scoggins) about relativity...

Preacher: Einstein's theory of relativity. Grab hold of a hot pan, second can seem like an hour. Put your hands on a hot woman, an hour can seem like a second. It's all relative. 
Tom Scoggins: I spent four years at CalTech, and that's the best physics explanation I've ever heard. 
It's very true though.  Einstein was such a brilliant man. I have yet to find one experience in life where the general theory of relativity doesn't hold true.  If you really think about your life, didn't the painful, heartbreaking, difficult, and worrisome moments seem to take forever whereas the really enjoyable moments seemed to not last long enough?  Boy oh boy, the list of moments that dragged on seems to be longer than the moments that flew by as I reflect on it but I think I've had just about as much good in my life as I had bad.  I think most of us are this way.  It's just that the bad experiences suck so much, we reflect on them more and they take up more of our time and energy because we obsess or worry about it.

Imagine what life would be like if you spent as much time dwelling on the happy moments, the blessings, the joys as you do the struggles and the worries?  It really could change things so much in your life but man, it's hard to do!!  Sometimes I feel like an ingrate because I worry so much about the stresses and heart break, I forget how truly blessed I am.  I have had some nightmarish years that have passed and I am so happy to leave them behind.  2012 was not an easy year, it was full of heart break but in retrospect, it wasn't that bad.  I thought that New Years Eve would be a lonely and depressing day as the days before it were really hard days for me emotionally.  A friend came and surprised me and Alaka'i at the beach last night to watch the fireworks and presented me with an opportunity that I never even knew or guessed was possible.  I never thought he would ever be even the slightest bit interested in me but he loves my son (he's one of his coaches) and he was there for me through a difficult day on Sunday.  He presented me with the opportunity to be happy but to do so I had to leave the person from my past who was upsetting me so much recently in my past...easier said than done... I'm gonna blog more on this later after I have more time to really think about it and talk to both guys but yeah... decisions... now back to starting fresh.

I have an idea that I would like all of you to join me with.  It's a simple idea and probably easier said than done idea but a great one, at least I think it's great.  Look at that photo.  Look at how the cool aqua water is washing away 2012 as 2013 is now in the foreground.  Let's allow all the bad, all the negative, all the mistakes, all the embarrassments, all the shame, all the guilt, all the stress and all the agony of the 2012 and past years wash away and focus on the  year ahead and all the blessings we have in our lives right now.  Of course we will never forget the past and the bad, but let's stop dwelling on it and instead, focus on how lucky we all are to be alive and move forward.  Don't let past mistakes cripple you in the present or the future. We have to let go and move on.  I know not all of you have the same beliefs that I do but for me, it's a matter of "let go, let God".  I need to stop trying to outsmart God's plan for me and trust in Him and instead of worrying about all the bad that has past, focus on how truly blessed I am to be alive and with the ones I love.

I am truly thankful for every breath of life, for all my loved ones and for all of you. I know it sounds trite, but I really truly, to the depths of my soul, am thankful for each and every one of you who have followed this little blog of mine and I look forward to extending and growing my friendship with all of you as the year progresses.

Let's allow the bad of 2012 and all the years that have passed wash away and look forward to 2013 and all the opportunities ahead of us!! Let's make this the best year yet!!

Happy New Year my lovelies!!


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