9:48 PM

It is with a heavy heart that I write this post tonight.  Why, why do such needlessly tragic acts of violence happen?  Why?  Today I picked my son up from school and explained to him that there was an attack in Boston at the marathon where two explosive devices went off and at least 2 people died and dozens were injured.  I explained to him how a little boy, only 8 years of age was one of those killed in the blast and that the police have not found the person responsible for this act of terrorism yet... He asked me why?  Why something like this happens, why people shoot schools or blow up other people... I looked at him with no real answer because such violence baffles me as well.  I looked in to his brown eyes and told him,"because there is a lot of evil in the world and a lot of people who do evil - just because they want to".

The last 5 months have been filled with questions and general bewilderment for my son because now that he's eleven, he is now old enough to know and understand how serious all the events, the fighting and the needless acts of violence in the news are.  He's slowly becoming more aware that true evil, true misery, true loss exists in this fallen world we live in and it's really hard for me to watch him come to these realizations.  I worked so very hard to shelter my boy, to protect him from the evils of this world but now that he's getting older, he's reading news papers and watching the news now more than ever because they discuss current events in his class.  He's coming to the realization that the world is full of people who commit heinous acts of evil without reason and I see a little part of his innocence get chipped away little by little.

As a mother, it's my job to protect him but also to allow him to know what's going on the world and how it affects him.  He's not a baby anymore, no matter how much I'd like to freeze time and keep him small, he will continue to grow and God willing, will become a wonderful man someday.  I have to equip him with the knowledge and skills necessary to cope in this world and to deal with the needless violence in this world without losing hope.  Despite all the evil and hate that exists, God is still with us and we need to keep our eyes on Him.  I don't know what I'd do without Jesus. I know not all of you share my beliefs and I'm not trying to push them on you, I'm just sharing what I believe and how that faith in God gets me through horrific days like today.  The hardest part about being a parent is letting go and allowing your child to make their own decisions as they mature into young adults, hoping and praying they'll make the right decisions all the while knowing you can't make those decisions for them.  Free will.  We are God's children and though He loves us, He will never push himself on us or force us to follow Him. He wants us to love Him freely just as I want my son to love me freely but we all have to make that choice for ourselves because God gave us free will and it can be used for good and for evil.  I just have to try my best to be a good daughter to God.

Man today I was so worried and saddened when I heard the news.  I prayed when I found out what happened and immediately started to have sort of a panic attack because people near and dear to me live in Boston and I couldn't reach any of them.  Turns out that due to the chaos, phone service was patchy at best. I just thank God that those I love are safe.  I pray for all those who were killed and injured and pray that the guilty parties who thrust this violence on the great city of Boston are caught and put to justice.

Such needless violence, needless tragedy.  If only people could be decent and not hurt others for some sick sort of gratification...  Signs of the times I suppose.  It's just so heartbreaking to see such suffering.

I hope you are all safe and well.  Take those moments to embrace those you love even closer and thank God for every second of life because none of us knows when it will be our last.  If you don't have anyone to embrace, if you feel unloved and alone... know that you are not alone, that you are so loved by God, even if you don't believe in Him.  I'm sending virtual hugs your way and if you need someone to talk to, a friendly ear to listen...I'm here.  You are loved, you are worthy, you are precious so don't discount your value in this world.  ***** ME SENDING BIG HUGS YOUR WAY *****

I pray for the people of Boston, for the victims and their families and for the law enforcement; may they find the guilty parties and bring them to justice.

Love and Aloha to all of you,

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